50 Goldfish Puns That Are Sure to Scale Up the Humor!

best funny goldfish Puns
Written by Fuuny Puns Team

Goldfish puns touch on subjects like fishbowls and tanks, swimming and ocean creatures, goldfish memory and intelligence, and imagining goldfish in human roles and activities.

Goldfish puns play on a goldfish wanting to “drive” its tank or bowl. Others feature goldfish becoming doctors, detectives, philosophers or astronauts. There are also puns about goldfish keeping fit, listening to music, philosophical ponderings and more.

Overall, 50 Best Goldfish Puns tend to riff on fishy characteristics to craft lighthearted wordplay.

50 Best Goldfish Puns

  1. my goldfish are named major, minor, dorian, mixolydian, and pentatonic. the only way i can tell them apart is by their scales.
  2. why did the goldfish become a lifeguard? it wanted to keep others a-float!
  3. my daughter told me this one today and it had me in stitches. two goldfish are in a tank… one turns to the other and says: “you man the guns, i’ll drive”
  4. social swimmer? my goldfish is the party fin-der!
  5. what did the goldfish say to the turtle? ‘you’re just a slow-poke!’
  6. what’s a goldfish’s favorite vacation destination? the great barrier “reef”!
  7. how do goldfish make important decisions? they flipper a coin!
  8. whats’s yellow and can’t swim? a dead goldfish.
  9. ever heard of the goldfish that went bankrupt? now he’s a bronzefish.
  10. a goldfish has memory for up to 5 months the average gamer has memory for about 24 hours
  11. what do you call a goldfish with no eyes? fshhhh!
  12. “the fishy writer”: how do goldfish express their thoughts? they write “fin”-tastic stories with a touch of underwater magic!
  13. how did the goldfish break up with his girlfriend? he told her, ‘it’s over, you’re too shellfish!’
  14. what do you call a goldfish that’s always in a hurry?a: fast food!
  15. why did the goldfish get a job at the bakery? it loved to work with dough-lphin!
  16. my wife thinks we should allow our pets to sleep with us in bed. i finally gave in. after 20 minutes, the goldfish finally settled down.
  17. “the fishy astronaut part ii”: how do goldfish stay fit in space? they do “fin”-tastic zero-gravity exercises!
  18. what’s a goldfish’s favorite type of music? aqua-rock!
  19. why did the goldfish bring a suitcase to the party? it wanted to travel in style!
  20. “the fishy doctor”: why did the goldfish become a physician? it wanted to help other fish feel “fin”-tastic!
  21. “the fishy gardener”: how do goldfish help plants grow? they provide “fin”-tastic fertilizer with their waste!
  22. why did the goldfish become a scientist? to conduct “fin”-tific research in marine biology!
  23. two goldfish are in a tank, one of them turns to the other and says hey! who’s gonna drive this thing?
  24. “the fishy philosopher part v”: what did the goldfish say about dreams? “they’re like bubbles in the water, waiting to be chased!”
  25. how does a goldfish keep fit? it goes to the fin-ness center!
  26. what do you call a goldfish who’s always late? tardy-fish!
  27. two goldfish are in a tank… one turns to the other and says: “you man the guns, i’ll drive”
  28. “the fishy scientist”: how do goldfish conduct experiments? they use “fin”-tastic beakers and test tubes filled with water!
  29. “the fishy detective part iii”: how do goldfish solve underwater mysteries? they follow the “fin”-gerprints and unravel the truth!
  30. i think my goldfish likes it when i take him out of his bowl… he sure wags his tail a lot…
  31. “the fishy chef part iii”: what’s a goldfish’s favorite cooking utensil? the “fin”-ger whisk!
  32. what’s a goldfish’s favorite way to send messages? by “fin”-ternet!
  33. “the fishy barber part iii”: what’s a goldfish’s favorite hair product? “fin”-ishing gel!
  34. “the fishy dancer part iii”: how do goldfish impress the judges in dance competitions? they “fin”-ish their routine with a graceful leap!
  35. “the fishy astronaut part iii”: how do goldfish eat in space? they use “fin”-tastic straws to sip their meals!
  36. why did the goldfish take up karate? it wanted to learn some fin-spired self-defense!
  37. why did the goldfish become a chef at a sushi restaurant? it had a “fin”-tastic palate for fishy flavors!
  38. i’d like to buy a goldfish, i you want an aquarium? they asked.i said, i don’t care what star sign he is.
  39. “the fishy astronaut”: how do goldfish explore outer space? they take a “fin”-tastic voyage in their rocket ship!
  40. what’s a goldfish’s favorite instrument? the bass guitar, of course!
  41. where do goldfish keep their money?in the river bank.
  42. “the fishy dentist”: how do goldfish take care of their teeth? they use “fin”-tastic toothpaste made from seaweed!
  43. goldfish are good pets, but… siamese fighting fish are betta!
  44. “the fishy athlete part ii”: why did the goldfish win the marathon? it had “fin”-credible stamina!
  45. you look like somebody stepped on a goldfish.
  46. what do you call a goldfish with a lot of muscles? fin-tastic!
  47. what’s a goldfish’s favorite game at the fair? “ring the fishbowl”!
  48. what do you call a goldfish with a crown? king triton!
  49. what’s a goldfish’s favorite way to relax after a long swim? watching “fin”-tastic movies!
  50. a recent survey has said that 29% of owners sleep with their pets on the bed. i tried it once and my goldfish died.

Feel free to add your puns using the comments section below.

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About the author

Fuuny Puns Team

With a shared love for puns, we come together to create content that will leave you laughing and entertained. Our team members have a knack for finding the perfect puns for any occasion and enjoy sharing them with our readers. From witty one-liners to clever wordplay, we strive to bring you the best puns and humor that will brighten your day.

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