95 Mustard Puns Certain to Tickle Your Funny Bone

Mustard is a classic condiment with a long history across many cultures. It adds a bright yellow color and pungent, tangy flavor to dishes from sandwiches to salad dressings.

Whether I’m putting a new twist on “mustard puns” or comparing the merits of Dijon vs yellow, you can expect a tasty taste of wordplay sure to tickle your funny bone. So grab your hot dog and beverage of choice, get comfy and prepare for the condiment comedy of a lifetime!

95 Best Mustard Puns

1. give me a little time to mustard a response.
2. why did the mustard get promoted? because of its exceptional leadership abilities.
3. mustard: the condiment that’s never afraid to cut the mustard!
4. i may not be an expert mustard maker, but i know how to put mustardy sauce on some mustard!
5. what do u give a dog that has high temperature? mustard, it’s the best thing for a hot dog
6. what do you call a mustard that’s full of confidence? self-mustard!
7. a singer known for her show in las vegas has introduced a line of gourmet mustard… celine dijon
8. q.
   why was the hamburger thrown out of the army?
   a. because he couldn’t pass the mustard.
9. mustard: the golden ticket to flavor town!
10. as a shepherd, i mustard the sheep.
11. did you hear about the mustard race? they’re always ahead of the ketchup!
12. a guy survived pepper spray and mustard gas now, he’s a seasoned veteran
13. don’t sit near mustard… he has the worst gas.
14. mustard: the culinary superstar that’s always in the limelight!
15. the soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray was a seasoned veteran.
16. why did the burger bring both mustard and ketchup to the party? to ‘relish’ the fun times!
17. why was mustard racing ketchup?a: it was weiner take all.
18. she says, “i have another dress for you to clean.”the owner who is slightly hard of hearing replies, “come again?””oh no, it’s just mustard”
19. when mustard is sad, it has the tendency to “hang its head low.”
20. mustard is extremely polite; it always apologizes if its french is mispronounced, while still managing to say, “oh sorry… but i’m hot!”
21. why did the mustard always win at poker? it had a good poker face, or should we say, “pouquer” face!
22. clerk: hello ma’am, what can we do for you?woman: i would like to drop off my coat.clerk: ok, what would you like us to do with it?woman: i would like you to get the stain out of the collar area.clerk: come again?woman: no, it’s mustard this time.
23. maybe i should have put more mustard on my cheeseburger in heinz sight, i should have added more ketchup
24. mustard: the condiment that spreads happiness, one sandwich at a time!
25. mustard: the secret ingredient that unlocks a world of delectable possibilities!
26. a hot blond walks into a dry cleaners. she tells the teller “i need to get a stain removed from my sweater. the teller being a little hard of hearing asks “come again?” to which she replied ” no, its mustard.”
27. we’re the three mustard-errs.
28. not being an expert, i can provide some facts regarding mustard’s chemical makeup.
29. gordon ramsay once survived a mustard-gas attack when he was in the army. then, he got pepper-sprayed whilst at a protest. you could say that he is relished among the cooking community, and truly a seasoned veteran
30. why did the mustard lose the race between sauces? because it couldn’t ketchup
31. i may not be an accomplished mustard yogi, but i can use my peacemaking talents to spread some cheer.
32. what credit card do you use for buying condiments?a: a mustardcard.
33. mustard (muster) all your courage.
34. mustard: the condiment that spreads joy, one sandwich at a time!
35. although i may not be a mustard zombie, i can certainly get their brains working over.
36. i mustard you a question.
37. why did the hot dog dress up for halloween? it wanted to catch up to the mustard’s ‘costume’!
38. why did the mustard cross the road? to get to the ketchup!
39. why should you put mustard on a puppy with a fever? because it’s the best thing for a hot dog
40. not strictly speaking a mustard connoisseur, i appreciate a good dijon mustard!
41. mustard: the flavor that’s “mustered” a loyal following!
42. mustard loves playing hide and seek, often hiding behind mayo for safekeeping.
43. well this should spice things up. i relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.
44. monica lewinsky walks into her dry cleaners, the guy is a little old and hard of hearing. monica says “i need to get this dress cleaned, no starch, use the same hanger.”the dry cleaner responds “come again?”monica says “nope, this time it’s mustard.”
45. a soldier survived mustard gas in battle, and then pepper spray by the police. he’s now a seasoned veteran.
46. how did the hot dog get a date?a: he mustard up the courage to ask.
47. mustard: the condiment that adds a tangy kick to your culinary adventures!
48. what can be found inside of a mustard? an amuse bouche necklace!
49. mustard: the flavor that makes food sing with joy!
50. “give me a little time to mustard a response.”
51. although i may not be an authority in mustard-related topics, i can provide you with advice for your mustard needs.
52. i may not be the mustard master, but i can certainly whip you up some delicious mustard to satisfy that munchy craving!
53. mustard is proof that great things come in small, squeezable packages!
54. a soldier was assaulted with pepper spray and mustard gas. he returned home a seasoned veteran.
55. you mustard sooner rather than later.
56. what credit card do you use for buying condiments? mustardcard
57. why did the mustard bring a map to the barbecue? it wanted to ketchup with all the hot dogs!
58. what do you call mustard that’s not very hot?a: air condijoned.
59. mustard: a little dollop of magic that transforms ordinary meals into extraordinary feasts!
60. what did mustard say to ketchup? “you will forever remain my condiment!”
61. mustard: the saucy superhero of condiments!
62. what was the response from the hotdog when presented with mustard? you did a phenomenal job cutting back the amount of mustard!
63. mustard and ketchup walked into a bar – it was a ‘saucesome’ night!
64. a guy walks into a bar a guy walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hot dog. “do you want ketchup and mustard on that?” the bartender asks. “neither. i just want to relish it.”
65. mustard: the flavor that’s “mustered” a cult following!
66. mustard always comes out ahead in any race it enters.
67. someone asked me recently why i don’t put any ketchup or mustard on my hotdog and i told them it’s because i just wanna relish it.
68. the soldier who survived mustard-gas and pepper-spray…. is now a seasoned veteran
69. mustard: the condiment that adds a kick of personality to any dish!
70. i don’t celebrate cinco de mayo, but i do celebrate seis de mustard.
71. he loves ketchup and mustard… …but manti te’o is anti-mayo.
72. why did mustard attend therapy? because its issues had grown too large.
73. you know which singer really cut the mustard? celine dijon
74. why did the mustard get a job as a detective? it had a knack for finding clues-seeds!
75. mustard: the versatile condiment that adds a pop of flavor to any dish!
76. mustard: the ultimate condiment for those who relish the spice of life!
77. what’s a mustard’s favorite dance move? the tangy two-step!
78. doctor: any other symptoms?me: no, but i have the strangest feeling that this has happened beforedoctor: french mustard?me: yes, why?doctor: it’s dijon view
79. mustard and ketchup are like the ‘kings’ of the condiment realm – they rule the flavor kingdom!
80. by law, i mustard-vise you to be careful.
81. the person in charge of the post office is the post-mustard.
82. yoda was a legendary jedi mustard.
83. why did mustard bring a broom to the party? so they could sweep competitors aside!
84. mustard enjoys playing card games; she excels in “spicy uno”.
85. mustard: the culinary superstar that’s always in demand!
86. i’m lucky to have survived mustard gas and pepper spay when i was in the army. i guess you could say that i’m a seasoned vet…
87. why did the tomato turn red? because it saw mustard disgracing itself.
88. why was the mustard seed sad? because it was all alone in the kitchen cabinet!
89. mustard loves dancing the spicy salsa step! it is his go-to move when dancing on stage.
90. which mustard has become most fashionable over time? dijon-vu!
91. i leaf (love) mustard like no other!
92. why did the mustard bring a ladder to the barbecue? it wanted to reach new heights of flavor!
93. q.
    what do you give to a dog with a fever?
    a. mustard is always the best thing for a hot dog!
94. i knew a guy who survived mustard gas and pepper spray he is now a seasoned veteran
95. mustard get a kick out of these tom swifties!

Feel free to add your puns using the comments section below.